Transmuted

tears_of_sadness

Bing Images Public Domain

All color is transmuted, matte and gray;
the sun obscured by this ripping pain.
It’s unfathomable that you are gone,
the earth minus your comforting form.
 
My mind is fogged; I can’t conceive that
your breath has stilled to be no more.
Tears stain my face and well again
as I remember you and how we loved.
 
Your countenance pure and sweetly bright,
you brought good cheer and lifted my heart.
Accepting and kind, compassionate eyes
perused this world with a spiritual light.
 
For children and animals a special smile
was conveyed unlimited to share your charm.
Your hand outstretched to those along your path
was a gift bestowed like heaven on earth.
 
So though I miss you and still must mourn,
I realize that your precious time here was done.
You’re at peace now and I soon will be too
as I feel deep within that we’ll meet again.

Join me at dVerse Poets Pub as I present writing an elegy for Meeting the Bar Thursday at 3PM.

Dad

There you are in black and white

A photo taken posed for the camera

Your eyes locked with mine.

After you died we were gathering pictures

For a collage to celebrate your life.

I stared at this photo and started to cry–

I wanted to see some kindness there.

I said to my sister, look, don’t you see it?

It’s there in his eyes–it’s there I just know it.

But as I studied it closer, I saw the truth–

Your eyes mirrored back to me the empty,

Shallow space I had always encountered.

What was it that had held you so closed?

What had etched and chiseled the pain

On your heart so deeply and fixed

That you couldn’t feel ours?

You freely shared your depression and darkness

And your deep regret for the life of your choosing.

As I grew older my hate softened to sorrow as I realized

You weren’t capable of being the someone I needed.

In the shortened span of time at your ending

You remained firmly entrenched in your narcissism.

It was my folly that I looked for something more.

Distance

We still liked to walk together and explore the woods nearby,

even though a dissonant distance had now grown between us.

Our walk this day was much like the others, making observations

of the direction our pathway may take.

Across the trail we pushed through tangled brush and eye-level

tree limbs and soon came upon a small but steep incline.

You climbed up before me, and I behind, reached up to take your hand;

You declined.


An entry for dVerse Poets Open Link Night ~Week 73 hosted by Tashtoo:  http://dversepoets.com/2012/12/04/openlinknightweek-73/

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