Sevenling (She Stayed)

She stayed with him
in spite of his alcoholism,
disparate views of life and selfish ways.

Wild winds blow day and night
through the Kansas grasslands, prairies and trees.
Change comes slowly to this small town.

A jack rabbit keeps watch on the deepening leaden sky.

Thank you to rmp for inspiring me to try my hand at a sevenling after I read her intriguing write with this form. Victoria is our hostess over at dVerse. It’s Open Link Night…anything goes! http://dversepoets.com/2014/07/26/the-dog-days-of-summer-open-link-night/

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33 Comments

  1. This is such a challenging form, and I love what you did with it ~ I like the contrasting verses of the first and second tercet ~ I admire her to sticking with him even though there is a hint of trouble ahead with leaden sky ~

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    • Thank you, Grace. Some of these seemingly simple forms really can get you thinking…I enjoyed the challenge of this one.

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  2. Enjoyed the form and the juxtaposition of images – even the rabbit jumps – but on the Kansas plains, there is really no place to hide. Well done.

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  3. This feels like a summary of a movie with a powerful ending scene–that jackrabbit–like an exclamation point to the entire narrative. Or maybe the bones of a short story. The last line speaks to me of sadness, desolation. Kind of a spiritual dust bowl. Thank you, Gayle. You’re a special lady/friend.

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    • That’s a good way of describing that last line, Victoria…like an exclamation point to the narrative. The sevenling is an interesting form…if you should try it let me know. And thank you, sweet friend, for your kind words for me…you are a special one to me too.

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  4. Sometimes people can be strong enough to overcome their demons. To stay by someone’s side through them is a testament to their devotion. Interesting format, I do not know this one. Thanks for sharing.

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    • Thanks for sharing your thoughts here, Ginny. I always feel that it is great to be able to stand by a troubled spouse, friend…what have you, as long as you don’t allow them to deplete you. Then it’s a whole different deal.

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  5. scotthastiepoet

     /  July 27, 2014

    Very successful Gayle – this punched through well, i thought and lingered… With Best Wishes Scott http://www.scotthastie.com

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  6. You have worked the sevenling form so very well. Some things, it seems, never change…..people and nature have their ruts.

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  7. A sad story, reinforced by your closing line: the jackrabbit watching the deepening leaden sky, rather like foretelling the end of this story.

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  8. Always interesting how a sky can change from romance to despair or even inspiration..for the view of the watching eye..but i do love the memories of the darkness that these kind of poems bring..as the darkness is always a reminder of light for me..that does exist..brighter than ever now..@least for me..:)smiles and a great rest of SUNday..:)2ya2!

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    • I like (some of) those memories of the darkness too…because then I can marvel at how far I’ve come into the light. I’m so glad that your light is brighter than ever…very nice. Thanks for coming by and sharing with me, Katie.

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  9. Really an interesting form – loved the change in mood in each stanza – and the final line was such a beautiful image. K

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    • It is an interesting little form…really takes some thought. It was fun as well as challenging. I appreciate your comment for me…thanks.
      Gayle ~

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  10. Hmmm…a sevenling…
    I like the contrasts, content and neatness of this, Gayle.

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  11. Very interesting form.. I love how you bring out the change after each line, a hint of sadness there at the end… you create some powerful images.. very beautiful write!

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  12. Interesting form, I don’t think I’ve ever tried this before…sometimes change does come slowly.

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    • I found this form on rmp’s blog and decided to give it a go. Yes, mostly change does come slowly it seems.

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  13. Ooooh, a new form to try out! You know how I love poetry forms 😀

    “A jack rabbit keeps watch on the deepening leaden sky.” so, so ominous.

    All I could think was music from Garth Brooks’ “Thunder Rolls” at the end of reading this. Different scenario, but similar brooding sense of knowing what’s about to go down and it won’t be good.

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    • Hi Raivenne…good to see you. Well, if you try it, please let me know, would love to read it. I like when a poem evokes memories for people or stirs up their feelings. Thanks for sharing that.

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  14. so liked how you opened wide and brought the reader to the smallest thing despite the pain

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  15. I feel forlorn, discouraged, after reading this. I’m sure that’s what you were going for…

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    • Yes, it’s a discouraging topic and was meant to evoke the all-encompassing feeling of despair. Even that jack rabbit felt it… Thanks for coming by, Lorna.

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  16. Not the easiest from to master. Very well done. Think Sherman Alexie has used this form on occasion. May Anna Akmovtova too. You’re in good company.

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    • That should be “maybe” not “may” … LOL! Seems I can’t write a sentence tonight. 🙂

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      • Thanks for that, Jamie. I’m glad for the good company. And I just thought her name was “May Anna”…kind of pretty don’t you think? :~)

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