Unseen predator looms from the shadows,
as I fumble with the door latch, frantic with fear–
hidden apparition approaching ever near.
Now in a panic, the door still will not lock,
as I anxiously open and close it, praying it will.
Over and over, through many long years,
this nightmare assaults me–
awakening me in tears.
Based on a long ago incident
it comes to me unbidden,
reminding me repeatedly
when a late-night stalker prowled
and crept around outside.
Finally he was stopped
and brought down to his knees
but the fear still seems to pursue me
through my mind it’s still enshrined.
Bodhirose's Blog 
booguloo
/ June 8, 2011A self defense course might help you feel more secure. I’ve been told arming yourself is more dangerous.
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Bodhirose
/ June 9, 2011I’ve now gone to my mother’s house and consciously locked that same door to let my subconscious know that I am safe and nothing can come in and “get me”. So far it seems to be working–no more nightmares since!
While growing up, we left our doors unlocked all the time–those days are long gone!
Thanks, Michael.
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jgavinallan
/ June 8, 2011Really felt this one…Gayle…please tell me this was imagination. It is such a scary thought.
lots of hugs
Jaye
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Bodhirose
/ June 9, 2011Jaye, I have had a nightmare repeatedly because of several true incidents that happened while still a teenager living at home–this poem is that nightmare. I’ve given you the link here to the story I wrote about it if you’d like to read it. Warning: may scare you silly!
Love and hugs,
Gayle
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Explorations in Sacred Space
/ June 8, 2011Hi, Gayle!
You have comments on our site from Jaye and Amy. You might want to respond. If you do, I will approve them when I log in next time.
On the run now but I’ll be back her for a catch-up visit soon.
JamieDedes
P.S.: Got your fab email. Thanks!
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Bodhirose
/ June 9, 2011Hi Jamie–thanks for the heads up about the messages for me. I’ve responded to them now.
So glad my email was satisfactory. Thank you!
Hugs…
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Explorations in Sacred Space
/ June 9, 2011Approved! Thanks you… 🙂
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apollorose
/ June 8, 2011Your fear lives in your mind and not in reality. The incident took place long ago, dramatic, and the perception of that one event plays repeatedly if the environment is like when it happened or comes close to matching it.
You have a way of building up expectation. That’s a must for a writer. 🙂
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Bodhirose
/ June 9, 2011I think I may have foiled the fear. See my response to Booguloo above. Seems to have helped. I had written a story about what caused these nightmares some time ago–see the link I provided to Jaye above if you are interested in the story.
Thank you for your lovely comment for me, Apollorose–that’s very nice to hear! : )
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Isadora
/ June 9, 2011I recall reading your story sometime ago. I like it in this form much better. Good job of converting. The intensity was felt more this way.
YES … I remember never locking my doors years ago. Now, I check them several times especially before going to bed. These are different times. ~~~~ : – O
Namaste,
Izzy
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Bodhirose
/ June 9, 2011I think I wrote that story during our memoir days, Izzy. A poem format does seem to “condense” all the feelings and intensify them don’t they. I’m glad you felt that intensity.
Like you, my doors are locked and double locked nowadays!
Namaste,
Gayle
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Explorations in Sacred Space
/ June 9, 2011Wow! I can understand how such an incident would hang on. Smart way to put closure on it (your response to Michael.)
Sleep well from now on, dear poet.
Hugs!
Jamie
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Bodhirose
/ June 9, 2011Yeah, it was crazy.
Sleeping better, Jamie, thanks so much. : )
Gayle xoxo
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Luke Prater
/ June 9, 2011Strong stuff. Makes me shiver a little, takes me back to some drug-induced nightmares i had a while back. Ick. Good ink
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Bodhirose
/ June 9, 2011Ooo, drug-induced nightmares–those are heavy.
Thanks for your visit and comment, Luke–I appreciate it.
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Jess
/ June 9, 2011It seems you’ve handled the situation well. Nightmares are often issues we can do something about.
The writing was very well done. The intensity and the fear well conveyed. The poem does have more immediacy than the story, but this may just be in part because it’s shorter and more intense.
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Bodhirose
/ June 9, 2011Yes, it seems to have helped me. I thought if I could just consciously lock that door and send the message (to myself) that I was safe that it could help–and it did–happily!
Thank you for your most generous comment, Jess–I really appreciate it and am glad you liked my writing.
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liv2write2day
/ June 9, 2011That fear is so real and can be interpreted on many levels, can’t it. I had a similar experience when I was home alone as a teenager. My parents got home just in time. Yikes.
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Bodhirose
/ June 9, 2011Yes, the fear kind of trickles down into all the layers of our psyches. It seems that teenage girls are ripe targets. I’m so glad it ended well for you, Victoria.
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lesliepaints
/ June 11, 2011You are so good with the scarey stuff! I can’t tell you the times I have awakened and felt as though someone may be in my home. This poem is very convincing. I haven’t had a previous experience, but watch enough news and that can cause nightmares too!
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Bodhirose
/ June 11, 2011That must be a very disconcerting feeling, Leslie. I try not to watch so much negative news–it seems that’s all anyone wants to report about. Surely we have positive and good things happening in the world–let’s hear more of that! Right?
Thanks for coming by tonight.
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ALIVE aLwaYs
/ June 11, 2011Do you see a lot of horror movies?
I always develop greater sensitivity and acknowledge smallest of movements around me after seeing one, it’s cool though!
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Bodhirose
/ June 11, 2011No! I don’t watch horror movies. The horror happened to me in real life–this poem was about the nightmare that hung on for years afterward. See my response to Jaye and the link if you’re interested in the story of the events that triggered this nightmare.
Thanks for coming by and commenting.
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contemplativemoorings
/ June 11, 2011We have nothing to fear but fear itself…but fear can be pretty darn terrifying…
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Bodhirose
/ June 11, 2011It sure can! Yikes…
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Broken Sparkles
/ June 12, 2011Someone once told me in order to get rid off the fears we first have to face them! But I don;t wish to anyone to face such fears like yours! We all have events that have kept us afraid and awake, but all we could do is pray for better days! Well expressed emotions, catching the reader’s attention fully!
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Bodhirose
/ June 12, 2011It had us on edge for a while. The nightmare seems to be abating now–thank goodness. No fun!
Thanks for your supportive comment, Blaga. I really appreciate you! xoxo
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Broken Sparkles
/ June 12, 2011I hope you received my e-mail with questions!
And Also I would like to invite you to the challenge I’ll host in July if you have the time of course!
http://brokensparkles.wordpress.com/2011/06/11/seasons-favorite-challenge/
Thanks!
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Bodhirose
/ June 12, 2011Yes, I sure did receive your email and am working on the questions, Blaga.
I’ll check out your challenge–thank you for the invitation.
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Renee Espriu
/ June 12, 2011Sometimes in life the only way to deal with a stressful time is through our dreams where re-visiting it there can eventually help to put it to rest. Our minds are a
powerful avenue to sort, learn and protect us in life. This packs a punch! Nicely done.
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Bodhirose
/ June 12, 2011I agree with you, Renee–I do believe that our dreams can help us work through issues. They have very clearly done that for me.
Thanks for the nice comment.
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Madeleine Begun Kane
/ June 12, 2011Wow! That was really good! It capture my own feelings after being mugged in NYC many years ago. The fear stayed without me for a long time with odd manifestations like you describe. Nice job.
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Bodhirose
/ June 12, 2011Oooh, sorry to hear about your mugging, Madeleine–very frightening. It’s amazing how traumas like that can set up “housekeeping” in your psyche.
Thanks for coming by and for sharing your own experience–I really appreciate it.
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trisha
/ June 15, 2011childhood terrors return in nightmares. thats for sure.
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Bodhirose
/ June 15, 2011I’m pretty sure you read my story about this incident, Trisha. The nightmares seem to have abated since I went to my mother’s house and consciously locked that same door that the intruder had used.
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