Mysterious cries were heard throughout the mist
Disembodied voices arose within my mind
A shudder went through me–I thought I felt a kiss
Climbing the bluffs, sensing something amiss
A chilling, cold shiver crept up my trembling spine
Mysterious cries were heard throughout the mist
Daylight was waning, clouds were cirrus wisps
Twilight nearer, horizon no longer refined
A shudder went through me–I thought I felt a kiss
Prevailing shadows mock my measured steps
Hindering hills obstacles of my time
Mysterious cries were heard throughout the mist
Losing my footing, I slip and ankles twist
Strong arms felt around me prevent my incline
A shudder went through me–I thought I felt a kiss
Glimpsing ethereal vapor disappearing in my midst
My smile was offered to this unearthly divine
Mysterious cries were heard throughout the mist
A shudder went through me–I thought I felt a kiss
Jingle Poetry
/ July 10, 2011dreamy imagery, what a thrill.
Bodhirose
/ July 11, 2011I’m glad you liked it. Thanks! xoxo
Reflections
/ July 11, 2011Love the use of imagery… very powerfully paints a masterpiece.
Bodhirose
/ July 11, 2011A masterpiece–oh my–that’s quite a generous compliment. Thanks so much.
jgavinallan
/ July 11, 2011Gayle, the imagery and prose…oh yes. This could be a scene from a novel.
Your choice of words to paint the scene…wow!
Hugs…Jaye…very jealous
xoxo
Bodhirose
/ July 11, 2011It gave me a “Wuthering Heights” kind of feeling.
Sure do appreciate your lovely compliments, Jaye. Thank you.
Hugs… xoxo
Jingle
/ July 11, 2011way to go,
perfect one.
Bodhirose
/ July 11, 2011I guess you and “Jingle Poetry” are not the same person? Just wondering…
Thanks again! :)
becca givens
/ July 12, 2011I am glad I am not the only one wondering!! :D
Bodhirose
/ July 13, 2011Now I’m glad I’m not the only one wondering! I do wish I knew who these mystery people were… :)
trisha
/ July 11, 2011well it sure is a terrific villanelle. you captured the scene perfectly. left me wondering what will be coming out of the mist, out came a sweet companion :)
Bodhirose
/ July 11, 2011Yes, a sweet companion to help keep her safe.
Thank you for the wonderful compliment, Trisha.
Lots of love…
trisha
/ July 12, 2011you wove the scariness in the first part then made it cute.
Bodhirose
/ July 13, 2011Yeah, a little mysterious and scary and then her “benefactor” helped her. Thanks, Trisha.
booguloo
/ July 11, 2011Nice Villanelle!
Bodhirose
/ July 11, 2011Thank you, Michael.
Hugs…
lizbethsgarden
/ July 11, 2011Very nice — I like it.
Bodhirose
/ July 12, 2011Thanks so much. :)
PhotoDiction
/ July 12, 2011reads like a romantic dreamy novel scene… just a little better though :)
Bodhirose
/ July 13, 2011Well–that was nice thing to say–thank you! :)
Renee Espriu
/ July 13, 2011Mysterious and deep with words that leave one wondering…Is there or is it something else?!? Love the flow and the other worldly feel.
Bodhirose
/ July 13, 2011I’m glad that mysterious feel came across. Thank you, Renee! :)
Jamie Dedes
/ July 14, 2011Well done and the repitition works and helps reinforce the strange sense. Good!
Jamie Dedes
/ July 14, 2011Ha! Looks like my little fingers stuttered over repitition. Sorry! :-)
Bodhirose
/ July 14, 2011Thank you, Jamie. The villanelle does use repetition–I tried to go by the rules!
You never have to apologize to me for “stuttering” fingers. :)
Inside the Mind of Isadora
/ July 14, 2011I love the line – “mysterious cries could be heard throughout the mist” …
sounds so misty. No really that sends a chill – a little.
Beautiful ..
Izzy
Bodhirose
/ July 14, 2011I was going for the sense of a chill–I’m glad you felt one. :)
Thanks, Izzy!
Thomas Davis
/ December 22, 2011This is really well done. The repetition of
I thought I felt a kiss
builds tension and a colder and colder chill each time it is repeated. This is excellent, excellent work.
Bodhirose
/ December 23, 2011Thank you very much. This was my attempt at a Villanelle…so much of it is repetition. I’m glad it had that “chilly” affect on you–that’s what I was hoping for!